Showing posts with label jealous. Show all posts
Showing posts with label jealous. Show all posts
Wednesday, March 9, 2011
Love Is Blind But the Lover Shouldn't Be - The Very Language Which Never Seizes to End
By Funom Makama
The topic of Love can never seize to end in terms of practical reality and human reasoning. Experiences of heart break and subsequent consequence of fear have made a lot of people say a lot of things about Love. What is love actually and why do people fall in it?
First of all, Love itself is true. There is nothing like true love. We often have this misconception and when we are deeply in it, we consider it true love. Does that mean there is false love? Love itself is love and anything above or below or beyond it is not love. It is pure and independent on its on and whoever is experiencing it is experiencing Love.
We often mistake love and the lover. A girl who was sobbing in the subway was approached by a young man to be consoled. She turned her very wet angered face towards the man as she screams "You men are heartless, I will never fall in love again!". This caught so many passengers' attention and then she walked away. Really! You will never fall in love again? And can you tell us why? Is it because your lovers have been hurting you or because love itself is mean to you? Most girls due to bad experiences proclaim celibacy out of frustration. You can never be a nun overnight and celibacy is a natural phenomenon which you have to be born with and not just acquired instantly in a moment. Why blame it on love? Love is kind and patient, never jealous, boastful, proud or rude. Love isn't selfish or quick tempered. It doesn't keep record of wrongs that others do, it rejoices in truth, but not in evil, it is always supportive, loyal, hopeful and trusting and Love never fails. Is this what someone will proclaim not to experience?
A lover may exhibit jealousy, pride or selfishness, but that doesn't mean its a criteria of him loving you. Its just simply his human cons. When we end up with the wrong partner, maybe due to our carelessness or insensitivity to both sides of the person, we blame it on Love. No my friends, Love is blind and this is very true. What does it mean? It means love has no boundaries in race, color, height, social class, taste, and any other physical features. That is to say, a cobbler can marry a bank manager, a Hispanic can marry an African, a woman of 183cm in height can madly be in love with a man who is just 164cm; and a person who is seen as the weirdest, most unattractive could be as well cherished, worshiped and adored by another individual. Love is truly blind, but does it just end there? Absolutely No! The lover shouldn't be. What does this mean? In as much as you can love anybody from any race, color or other features which may not be parallel to yours, you still need to be careful, watchful and alert is loving someone who is very compatible to you. You have the right to know what you want and who can suite you best, then fall in love with such a person. You do not rush love and end up with the wrong person then finally blame it on Love again-that is absurd. remember, Love is patient and you just have to be as you grow stronger in it. You cannot know an individual for 3 months and conclude on marrying them.What exactly do you think you know about the person? Or do you think you are so engrossed in love that it is simply enough for you to spend your life with such a person?
An accountant, due to how tedious his job was vowed not to marry another accountant. There was a particular lady in his working place he has been avoiding. He tried all he could with other ladies and things did not just work out. After like 4 years of trials upon trials, he finally came to terms with the fact that he likes the lady but just avoiding her. He got to know her and they became the best couples ever. He used his job as a yardstick of love (which is wrong) and he was lucky enough to still come back and meet her available for him. A lady once said, she loves basket ballers and all she wants is to date and marry one. She was fortunate to date about 4 of them within the space of 8 months and it was horrible for her. The same thing she detested (pride) was the major characteristics of all the Basket ballers she knew. Finally, she came to terms with the fact that most of them are not really what she thought character-wise, finally, she fell in love with someone who was 5cm shorter than she is and not an athletic person in anyway.
We lust after some category of people and misconstrue this with love. Lust is totally different and it is something that is temporary. If we find out that we have this sudden passion and attraction for a certain category of persons due to some physical quality, then we should check-mate such desires. In most cases it is the wrong desire which may be taken to be love. You cannot be rigid to the specification of whom you will love. This is what is informally called "poppy love" or "high school love". 'The guy must be tall, huge, very athletic, strong, from a Jewish home' etc. And the funniest thing is sometimes we carry too many specifications for one person that such a person do not even exist in the world. You cannot channel love to whomever you want, it is a natural feeling which just comes and you feel it for a person after a while of attraction. Poppy love is very dangerous and it is so ridiculous to see some Adults doing this. Love is not about been pretty, or been rich, or been spiritual or been honest. Yes, these may be added qualities of attraction, but it takes two to love and if two halves come together to form wholeness, there must be cohesion and a perfect fitting for them to blend. Don't you think?
Finally, you are urged to leave your heart open to whoever it may finally love, nevertheless do not be blind in choosing who is more compatible to you because if you get hurt, its definitely not the fault of Love but the lover (either one of them or both of them). Make things right and do what is necessary to compliment this wonderful, God giving gift called Love. It is actually blind, but you the lover should never be!
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Good luck.
Article Source: [http://EzineArticles.com/?Love-Is-Blind-But-the-Lover-Shouldnt-Be---The-Very-Language-Which-Never-Seizes-to-End&id=5347708] Love Is Blind But the Lover Shouldn't Be - The Very Language Which Never Seizes to End
Labels:
boastful,
high school love,
jealous,
kind,
lover,
partner,
patient,
poppy love,
proud,
selfishness,
true love
Wednesday, January 12, 2011
Just Love Me!
By Dorothy Lafrinere
Just LOVE me, like a fat kid loves cake!
Have you ever felt like that? When I first heard that, it hit me like a ton of bricks. To be in LOVE like that or to be loved like that would just rule forever. Is that not what we are all yearning for? Do we not seek out LOVE from the second we breathe as an infant? We search our parents eyes for that look of LOVE. We smile because we know it makes them smile with the LOVE that they feel for us.
To LOVE or not to LOVE? This is the question we all ponder through out life.
Why do we yearn to be someones everything? We want nothing more than to feel like the LOVE of one`s life. We spend our lives looking for that special person that will make our world seem like a dream. We want to feel safe and secure in our choice of partners. But how do we really know that this one is "the one" we will LOVE unconditionally forever? How do we know that this choice of LOVE will not break our heart? How do we know that this LOVE will LOVE us when the chips are down and we are not that perfect person that they fell in LOVE with?
Well I hate to sound like a wet blanket here on a cold night, but nothing is guaranteed. Life promises us nothing. We make our lives what they are, right at this moment. In matters of the heart we gamble, and as I have said before, to give LOVE is to risk losing LOVE. That is just another one of those bleary facts. Like rain storms and snowfalls, we have no control over anything that nature has given to us. We can only do our best with what we have. I have spoken before about gifts. Well, LOVE is a gift when it is given and when it is received. It does not happen because we say we want it to, or when we like a person and say "LOVE me". HA. I am sure that almost everyone out there will agree to that. I am also certain that the word "Stalker" comes from that notion.
LOVE can be a very scary risk. "Have you ever been in love? Horrible isn't it! It makes you so vulnerable. It opens you up, totally exposing your heart only to let someone get inside you and twist things up so tight, you can barely breathe. You build up defenses, you build an entire suit of armor, so that nothing can hurt you, then that person, not seeming any different from any other person, wanders into your lonely life. You give them your heart. They didn't ask for it. They did something one day, like kiss you or smile your way, and then your life isn't your own any more. LOVE takes your heart hostage. LOVE swarms inside you. LOVE devours your entire being and leaves you crying in the darkness. With the simple phrase, "lets just be friends", it turns into a knife, cutting its way into your heart. The pain is like no other you have ever felt nor ever want to feel again. Not just in your imagination, not just in the mind. It's like losing a part of who you are, or rather who you were. That my friends is one reason we are so careful to not make the wrong LOVE choice. I know reading this totally makes one never want to do that. But we do, over and over again. Why?
Is it such a deep needed desire that we really have no control? Is cupids arrow that strong? YES on both counts.
LOVE is one of the most powerful sensations we will ever endure in our lives.
LOVE knows no limit to its power, no end to its trust, no loss of its hope.
LOVE can overpower anything.
LOVE stays up, when all else has falls down.
LOVE is felt when one grasps another's hand.
LOVE is as much of an object as an obsession. Everybody wants it and everybody seeks it, but few ever achieve it. Those who do, will cherish it, get lost in it, and among all, will never, ever forget it.
LOVE does not waste time looking for the perfect lover, instead it creates a perfect love.
LOVE is somewhat like an hourglass, the heart fills up on one side as the brain empties the other.
LOVE is admiring ones heart: as admiration is the love of ones mind.
LOVE is with you when you least deserve it, because that's when you really need it.
These are a few thoughts that I have that tell me what LOVE is and why LOVE is.
When we're incomplete, we're always searching for somebody to complete us.We must understand that until we admit that while our partner can add sweet dimensions to our lives, we alone are the only ones that can bring that same fulfillment to ourselves. No one is responsible for our happiness.
Some people fall into a pattern of needing that NEWNESS LOVE in their relationships. These people will go from one relationship to another forever, never getting off that roller coaster of failure. They never understand that LOVE has stages. LOVE at first is so full of mystery and excitement. Then we move into becoming comfortable with one another and blending our ways to continue to strengthen our LOVE for one another. We continue to grow with each other, adding newness to each other by growing in one world, but as two people. Our years together build our road to our destiny of spending our lives and enduring tribulations as one. If you want life to always be a bed of roses, then you best grow a few gardens, because the roses will only get there if you grow them or bring them to your life. In other words sweet people of LOVE, your LOVE and passion is only what you make it. If you ignore it or get too busy to feed it, it will die or fade away. It's like any other living breathing thing. LOVE needs to be treated with respect and treated like the special gift that it is.
Another thing we must be careful of is to let those we love be perfectly themselves, and not to twist them to fit our own image, otherwise LOVE is only the reflection of ourselves we find in them. LOVE like you mean it, it is the only true way to let your LOVE for one another grow stronger and continue to be all powerful and wonderful.
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Relationships ask us to contemplate "forever" as a way of life.
It is a world without end of our own creation.
Toni Sciarra Poynter
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The purpose of life is to discover your gift.
The work of life is to develop it.
The meaning of life is to give your gift away.
The gift, is LOVE!
Dorothy
Dorothy
Owner/Operator
Website- http://www.womensselfesteem.com
Forum- http://womenselfesteem.proboards29.com
email- [mailto:dorothy@womensselfesteem.com]dorothy@womensselfesteem.com
Article Source: [http://EzineArticles.com/?Just-Love-Me!&id=58975] Just Love Me!
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