Valentine’s Day Jokes

Valentine’s Day Jokes!

By Shawn Leblon

If you are looking for a few good laughs on Valentine's Day,
then some Valentine's Day jokes are just right for you. Laughter
is always a good medicine and bet you know it. So if you are
trying to bridge a gap with someone you love this Valentine's
Day, try doing it with a few jokes. The Valentine's Day jokes
are a unique blend of love and fun and will surely make your
beloved laugh, grin and smile. And if you are nursing a broken
heart, then shun those tears because the Valentine's Day jokes
are here to cheer up all troubled souls. Celebrate loving
yourself on Valentine's Day with the help of these Valentine's
Day jokes. Valentine's Day is a day to be happy, to feel loved
and pampered. So spread the joy around with the help of these
jokes listed below.

Shocking Love

A little girl asked her grandpa if it would be very wrong of
her to send a card to Osama on Valentine's Day. The old man was
visibly shocked and asked her why she wanted to do so.

“If I send him a card on Valentine's Day, then he might think
that I am not bad, and that little kids are not bad. So he might
stop hating us and gradually stop hating others and also stop
killing. Then he can come to us and say that he loves us”
replied the little girl.

Her grandpa was really touched by this thought of his
granddaughter and went to give her an appreciative hug, just
when she said: “then when he comes out in the open, the army can
shoot him !”

Business as Usual

At the post office Roger noticed a middle aged, stout and bald
man with many heart-shaped envelopes. He was sticking ‘love’
stamps on each envelope and was spraying them with perfume.
Obviously curious, Roger went up to him and asked him what he
was doing. With a big grin, the man replied: “I'm sending 5000
Valentine’s Day cards signed “guess who”. Roger was taken
aback—“But why on earth ?” The man replied—“You see I'm a
divorce lawyer !”

Chocolaty Wish

Six year old Sandy and her mom Julia both loved chocolates. On
Valentine's Day, Sandy and her dad gave Julia a big box of
chocolates. After a few days, Sandy began to eye the chocolates,
hoping to pop a few when no one was looking. She quietly got
into the kitchen and just as she was about to reach for the box,
her mom said, “If you touch it you have to eat it.” Sandy’s eyes
lit up and she patted her hands over all the chocolates. “Does
that mean I get to eat it all now ?”

Some Crazy Valentine's Day One-Liners:

“Did I tell you about that wonderful beaded dress I almost
bought for you ? But then I thought you’ll look great without
it, just the same.”

“This restaurant’s terrible, but it was the only place offering
50% off on Valentine's Day dinner, so I had to bring you here.”

“I know you don’t eat stuff with faces, that’s why I ordered
turkey legs.”

“It’s been much better ever since I accepted that my
Valentine's Day dates would never be smart.”

“My ex and I came here for our first date. Isn’t that nostalgic
?”

“Weren’t you the geekiest person in college ? How did you do a
makeover ?”

“Oh ! You’re having that ? Excuse me, got to run to the ATM.”

“Thank god I listened to my friends, or else I would never have
called you back.”

About the Author: Sean Carter writes on holidays, Valentine's
Day and world events. He is a writer with special interest in
ecard industry and writes for http://123greetings.com. He is an
active blogger at Valentines Day Blog.

Source: http://www.isnare.com

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